20 things that only happen in American movies

Posted by E.F., Lyon

1.  Women staying in a haunted house always investigate any strange noises wearing their most revealing underwear.

2.  If you're being chased through a city, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the year.

3.  All beds have special sheets that reach to armpit level on a woman but only up to the waist of the man lying beside her.

4.  Anyone can fly off at the controls of a plane as long as there’s someone in the control tower to give them permission.

5.  The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. Nobody will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to other parts of the building undetected.

6.  You’ll survive any battle in any war unless you make the fatal error of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

7.  A man can take a terrible beating without flinching but always jumps when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

8.  The police chief is always black.

9.  When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a note. Just grab one at random and hand it over.  It’ll always be the exact fare.

10.  Kitchens don’t have lighting.  When you go there at night, open the fridge and use its light instead.

11.  During all police investigations it’ll be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.

12.  A single match is usually sufficient to light up a room the size of a football stadium.

13.  Even when you’re driving a car along a perfectly straight road, it’s necessary to energetically turn the wheel back and forth every now and then.

14.  One man being shot at by 20 men has a better chance of surviving than 20 being shot at by one man.

15.  Most people have a book of newspaper clippings, especially if a family member has died in a mysterious boating accident.

16.  If you’re heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts, your opponents will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around you in a threatening manner until you’ve defeated their predecessor.

17.  When you’re having a very emotional conversation, instead of looking at the person stand behind them and speak to their back.

18.  If a psychopath is on the loose, it usually coincides with a storm that cuts all electricity and phone lines in the neighbourhood.

19.  All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red digital displays so you know exactly when they’re going to explode.

20.   It’s always possible to find a parking spot directly outside or opposite the building you’re visiting.